Jokes

Posted on 7 July 2015


We are happy to share with you a collection of funny jokes updated daily. As always, we appreciate your contribution to this collection.

The boss of a major manufacturing facility was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn't getting any respect.
Later that morning, he went to a local sign shop and bought a small sign that read, "I'm the Boss!" He then taped it to his office door.

Later that day, when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that read, "Your wife called. She wants her sign back!"

-- Joke submitted by Ralph Clayton   [Jokes]



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After a basketball game, the coach found a cell phone on the gym floor. He picked it up and handed it to one of the referees, saying "Here's your phone."

"What makes you think it's mine?" the referee asked.

"Easy," the coach replied. "It says you missed 13 calls."

-- Joke submitted by Ted Milton   [Jokes]



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Two older gentlemen were talking and one said to the other, "You're having an anniversary soon, right?"

The other replied, "Yup, a big one, 20 years."

"Wow," said the other, "What are you going to get your wife for your anniversary?"

The other replied, "We're going on a trip to Australia."

"Wow, Australia, that's some gift!" said the other man. "That's going to be hard to beat. What are you going to do for your 25th anniversary?"

"Go back and get her."

-- Joke submitted by bunbuns   [Jokes]



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A guest speaker is trying to make himself heard over the racket of a boisterous football team dinner. He complains to the president who is sitting next to him. "It's so noisy, I can't hear myself speak."

"I wouldn't worry about it," replies the president. "You're not missing much."

-- Joke submitted by VickyLoo   [Jokes]



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A young air force officer had a very beautiful wife. Early each morning he left his house and went to the airport, and an hour later his wife always left the house too, with a big white towel, and went for a walk on the beach.

Her husband always flew over every morning, and when she saw his aeroplane, she held the white towel high above her head. When her husband saw it, he made either the left wing or the right wing of his aeroplane go down. The left wing meant "I will be busy tonight and won't be home." The right wing meant, "In eight hours I will be holding you in my arms."

One morning he flew over with eight other aeroplanes, and his left wing went down. Before his wife had time to feel sad about this, all the other aeroplanes flew over, and each one of them turned its right wing down.

-- Joke submitted by Dandury   [Jokes]



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