Jokes

Posted on 28 February 2015


We are happy to share with you a collection of funny jokes updated daily. As always, we appreciate your contribution to this collection.

A boy comes home from school and says to his mom, I lost my virginity today".
His mom replies angrily, "You tell your father about what you've done, when he gets home!" His dad comes home about twenty minutes later and he tells his dad that he lost his virginity. His dad says, "Good job son! How was it?
Then the son says, "It was pretty good Dad, but do you have any Vaseline? My ass hurts."

-- Joke submitted by anonymous   [Jokes]



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A man goes into a little neighborhood pub, and when he sits down,
he notices a beautiful woman sitting at the other end of the bar.
He waves to her, and much to his surprise, she winks back at him.
It doesn't take long before he is on the stool next to her.

They talk for about fifteen minutes and then the man says to the woman,
"You're really hot!"

"You're pretty cute, too," she says to him. "I'll tell you what.
I live just around the corner. What do you think about coming
up to my place?"

"It sounds great!" the man eagerly replies.

"Before we go up there, though," the woman says,
"I have to ask you one question. Do you like doing it Greek style?"

"Well...uh...I'm not exactly sure what that is," the man answers,
"but it sure sounds interesting and I'm willing to learn! Let's go!"

So the two of them walk over to her apartment.
As soon as they get inside the door, the woman rips off all her clothes.
The man can't believe his eyes. The woman has an incredibly beautiful body.
"Now, you're *sure*," the woman asks, "that you want to do it Greek style?"

"Definitely!" the man replies.

"All right, then," says the woman.
"Take off all your clothes, and get up on the bed on yours hands and knees."

"Sounds like fun!" the man exclaims. He leaps out of his clothes and
climbs onto the bed on his hands and knees.

The woman goes around and gets onto the bed right in front of the man.
She kneels down in front of his head. She asks him again,
"Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?"

"Yeah! Yeah!" says the man.

The woman grabs the man with her arms right under his armpits,
getting him in a lock hold. He can't move at all, and his head
is pressing right into her chest.

One more time she says, "Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?"

The man's muffled voice can barely be heard from between her breasts.
"Yeah!" he mumbles,
"Greek style!"

The woman's grip on him tightens like a vice, and she yells out,
"OK Bill, he's ready now !"

-- Joke submitted by anonymous   [Jokes]



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